Does a timely “smack” prevent problems?

In many homes, you can still hear the phrase, “a timely smack prevents problems.” However, this ignores the physical and emotional impact it has on children. Instead of correcting behavior, it causes fear and leads to lying to avoid the “smack”.

Parenting is a difficult task. We act according to what we experience. Social institutions influence the development of beliefs that impact the lives and coexistence of their members. If the idea that suffering is necessary for learning is reinforced, our actions will tend to respond to that belief.

Some parents will say, “I was raised that way and I turned out fine.” However, studies by mental health professionals have shown that hitting aggravates the behavior that is expected to change, affects children's social and emotional development, and normalizes violence in their interactions with others. So what do we do?

There are nonviolent methods of discipline. At Vimenti, we are certified and offer the ACT: Educating Children in Safe Environments program, which focuses on providing families with discipline strategies based on respect and empathy. Topics such as children's behavior, the impact of violence on their development, the expression and management of emotions in parents and children, the influence of electronic media, and different parenting styles are addressed. Families learn new techniques and reflect on their parenting experiences.

The testimonials of participating families reflect the positive impact of the program. One mother shared, “Now I understand that my daughter doesn't misbehave to annoy me, but because she wants me to listen to her.” Another mother mentioned, “I take a deep breath before reacting. I want to be a positive role model for my daughters.”

These testimonials remind us that children do not need to be hit to learn; rather, they need adults who are present, patient, and protective. Physical punishment imposes momentary obedience but leaves long-term negative effects.

At Vimenti, we continue to work from the Two Generations Model, which simultaneously supports children and adults, thereby breaking the cycles of poverty and violence. Transforming the way we raise children is essential to this process. We invite more families to join us in this change of perspective. There is no perfect way to raise children, but doing so with love and respect allows us to raise individuals who are capable of managing their emotions, communicating effectively, and interacting positively with their environment.

by Jaina Martínez Ojeda, LSW

Case Worker, Vimenti